So, what features are “new”?

Well, first up is, surprise surprise, multitasking. After years of telling people they didn’t need multitasking, Apple have now said multitasking makes the phone better. Granted, to be fair and unbiased (yeah right, when has that ever happened?), they’ve said that they’ve reinvented how multitasking works, in a way that won’t drain the battery of the phone. Here’s the thing though: it’s still not actually true multitasking. It’s multitasking, as interpreted by Apple, because it seems as if it will only let certain things run in the background. Like audio, location services, and VoIP. And since Steve Jobs is so vehemently against even the concept of a task manager (seriously, he said as much in the Q&A), and that he said users won’t need to bother about closing apps, it increasingly seems like Apple don’t trust people to be able to do anything beyond ‘press button to receive a food pellet’.

Next new feature: Folders. Yes, Apple made a big deal about being able to put apps on the homescreen in folders. It’d be childish to mention that Android has been doing that since day one, so I’ll mention that Android has been doing that since day one.

Next up, email, but since all they’ve done is given the OS a unified inbox and made it easier to manage threaded conversations, we’ll not dwell on it. So, next up, business tools. Yes, Apple have added a new suite of tools aimed specifically at attracting business users, including wireless app distribution (so a company can send out new apps to its employees), better data encryption and protection, and multiple Exchange email accounts.

Next, iBooks. E-book reader. Same as on the iPad. Bit dull.

Next, and this one’s a good one (for mocking purposes): Apple copy Microsoft with their Games Center! Yup, it’s basically Xbox Live, but for the iPhone. Seriously, it’s got online multiplayer and Achievements. Hmm, they must be feeling threatened by Windows Phone 7. Oh and I had to laugh at the figures they put up, saying there were 50,700 games and entertainment titles available for the iPhone, and only 4,321 available for the Nintendo DS. I had to giggle at the fact Apple neglected to mention two facts: 1/ How many of those 50k titles are fart apps? 2/ Up to September 2009, roughly 34 million iPhones had been sold. Up to December 2009, 125 million Nintendo DS consoles had been sold…

Anyway, moving on to the bit I love: iAd. This is, basically, a way for people to serve ads directly through apps. Yes, Apple have decided to enhance users’ experiences by pushing ads at them, and no doubt, some Apple fans will swallow that up, and agree that absolutely the best thing for them is for Apple, their kind and just masters, to throw ads at them. On their own phone.

Honestly, it’s depressing, it really is, how people will believe these things to be benefits. Sure, multitasking is a benefit, but it comes with Apple controlling the strings, and Apple will always only have Apple’s best interests at heart. God forbid anyone would want to do something with their phone, other than what Apple tell them to do, right?

Anyway, I’ll end on two bits of the presentation I found particularly amusing, both from the Q&A. The first was Steve Jobs, when asked about running unsigned apps on the iPhone, said that Android has an adult store, before saying, essentially, “WON’T SOMEONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN??” Puritanism rules!

Oh, and the second was Steve Jobs saying “We shipped on Saturday, and rested on Sunday.”

If that isn’t proof positive that Jobs has a god complex, I don’t know what is…

Anyway, the new iPhone OS 4.0 is out soon, and you can download it to the iPhone 3GS, if you want to use it. Or you can get it for the iPhone 3G, but not all the features will work. Or you can wait and buy the inevitable new iPhone that’ll be coming in the summer. Or you can buy a proper phone, y’know, a